Most Gnomish Sentence At This Moment In Time

Okay, brace yourselves: I'm about to attempt to write the most Gnomish sentence in human history. It's an act of rebellion, if you will, against the Gnomish agenda.

I don't know what kind of fuddy-duddy bugaboo you think I am, spouting gobbledygook and claptrap as I dillydally about doohickies and gewgaws and flibbertigibbets and doodads, but before you think there's any hanky-panky here giving you the heebie-jeebies, I'd have you know that there's no rinky-dink hocus pocus or flim-flam here. Rather than being some hoity-toity hugger-mugger out to razzle-dazzle you with some humdrum, higgledy-piggledy, topsy-turvy whatchamacallit, I'd also have you know that everything's hunky-dory as I lollygag about with my itsy-bitsy hurdy-gurdy, a knickknack thingamajig I hornswoggled from some roly-poly riffraff willy-nilly, while he was shilly-shallying about the place, looking for this mumbo jumbo thingamajig he'd lost pell-mell. Well, I tell you, there was some hurly-burly as I got out of there in my itty-bitty, razzmatazz jalopy, before helter-skelter came down upon my pointy hat.

And there you have it. It's best said with an accent, whether Cockney or Southern, and, ideally, is said while you're sitting on a mushroom, but it captures the irreducible essence of Gnomethink.

GWD: Cockamamie

There are a handful of gnomish words that I had meant to post here but had neglected, but I was flabbergasted (!) to see that I'd omitted cockamamie! Which is, interestingly, an American word, which again points to gnomish incursions in the United States.

cock·a·ma·mie
adjective North American informal

ridiculous; implausible "a cockamamie theory"

GWD: Flabbergast

The gnomes haven't done away with me just yet. No doubt they're stuffing their corncob pipes from the warm shelter of their well-hidden mushroom warrens. It occurred to me the other day that not only had it been awhile since I'd posted, but that I'd neglected a key gnomish word, and, well, let's just say I was flabbergasted (see what I did there?)

flab·ber·gast 
ˈflabərˌɡast/ verb informal

surprise (someone) greatly; astonish. "this news has left me totally flabbergasted"

GWD: Lollygag

Most certainly a gnomish word, embodying gnomish ethics, or lack thereof. As ever, one of those "origin unknown" kinds of words that are the chubby thumbprint of gnomish wordsmithery. Although it's curious to me that the origin's unknown but the first use of it is known. Frickin' Victorians, lollygagging about for their gnomish masters...

lollygag
intr.v.
To waste time by puttering aimlessly; dawdle.

origin unknown
First Known Use: 1868

GWD: Hugger-Mugger

Yet another gnomish word, articulating gnomish values, with the same nonsense compound word structure, bound insidiously by a hyphen, always the "tell" where gnomish words and values are concerned. I wouldn't be surprised if a gnome invented the hyphen, in a bout of hugger-muggery. And notice the parallel themes so often with gnomespeak: disorder, confusion, and secrecy...

hugger-mugger
n.
1. Disorderly confusion; muddle.
2. Secrecy; concealment.
adj.
1. Disorderly; jumbled.
2. Secret; clandestine.
v. hug·ger-mug·gered, hug·ger-mug·ger·ing, hug·ger-mug·gers
v.tr.
To keep secret; conceal.
v.intr.
To act in a secretive manner.

GWD: Rinky-Dink

Yet another gnome word, reflecting gnomish aesthetics, or lack thereof. This probably reflects the gnomish penchant for pawning off inferior merchandise to unwary humans...

rinky-dink
adj.
1. Old-fashioned; worn-out.
2. Insignificant; unimportant.
3. Of cheap or poor quality; makeshift.
n.
One that is regarded as old-fashioned, worn-out, insignificant, or cheap in quality.

GWD: Hanky-Panky

You thought I'd run out of gnomespeak vocabulary, didn't you? I so haven't. Here's another gnomish word, and, as ever, it embodies all things gnomish. Other dictionaries list it as originating ~1841, although its origins are unknown, as is the case with all gnomish words. The first two meanings are the most gnomish, of course, although I wouldn't put lechery out of the purview of gnomish activity, to be honest. They seem like they'd be all for a little hanky-panky -- hell, a gnome would probably use that as an opportunity to whip out a handkerchief and make some kind of soul-killing pun to that effect.

hanky-panky

n Informal
1. dubious or suspicious behavior
2. foolish behavior or talk
3. illicit sexual relations

[variant of hocus-pocus]

GWD: Humdrum

I'm surprised I overlooked this time-honored gnomeword. No doubt this is one that gnomes crafted when the were bored. Instead of saying "This is boring" the damned gnomes had to say something like "This is so humdrum!" Which probably prompted whatever non-gnome around them to say "What the fuck are you even saying? Why don't you get off that fucking mushroom and talk clearly?"

hum·drum

adj.
Lacking variety or excitement; dull. See Synonyms at boring, dull.
n.
Monotonous talk or routine.
[Probably from hum.]

GWD: Riffraff

Again, they might take away the hyphen, but the pattern remains: gnomespeak. Gnomish riffraff with their word-wankery.

riff·raff

Pronunciation: \ˈrif-ˌraf\

Function: noun

Etymology: Middle English ryffe raffe, from rif and raf every single one, from Anglo-French rif e raf altogether

Date: 15th century

1 a : disreputable persons b : rabble c : one of the riffraff
2 : refuse, rubbish

— riffraff adjective

GWD: Hocus Pocus

Gnomes are masters of hocus pocus. You have been warned! And notice the tie-in with juggling? Coincidence? I think NOT!

ho·cus–po·cus

Pronunciation: \ˌhō-kəs-ˈpō-kəs\

Function: noun

Etymology: probably from hocus pocus, imitation Latin phrase used by jugglers

Date: 1647

1 : sleight of hand
2 : nonsense or sham used especially to cloak deception

GWD: Mumbo Jumbo

While this one has some provenance, it is squarely in the gnomish linguistic set, embodying gnomish values (especially meanings 2 and 3)...

mum·bo jum·bo

Pronunciation: \ˌməm-bō-ˈjəm-(ˌ)bō\

Function: noun

Etymology: Mumbo Jumbo, a masked figure among Mandingo peoples of western Africa

Date: 1738

1 : an object of superstitious homage and fear
2 a : a complicated often ritualistic observance with elaborate trappings b : complicated activity or language usually intended to obscure and confuse
3 : unnecessarily involved and incomprehensible language : gibberish
4 : language, behavior, or beliefs based on superstition

GWD: Itty-Bitty

In addition to being roly-poly, gnomes are itty-bitty. They are itsy-bitsy, too, while we're at it. This one's a latecomer to gnomespeak, but holds to the conventions of the language.

it·ty–bit·ty
Pronunciation: \ˈi-tē-ˈbi-tē\

Variant(s): or it·sy–bit·sy \ˈit-sē-ˈbit-sē\

Function: adjective

Etymology: probably from baby talk for little bit

Date: 1938

: extremely small : tiny

GWD: Roly-Poly

You probably thought I'd finished with the gnomish hyphenated nonsense words, didn't you? Not by a longshot! This one is particularly useful because it actually describes the gnomish physique rather nicely...

ro·ly–po·ly

Pronunciation: \ˌrō-lē-ˈpō-lē\

Function: adjective

Etymology: reduplication of roly, from ²roll

Date: 1820

: being short and pudgy : rotund

GWD: Abracadabra

The archetypal "magic word" is, yes, gnomish. The annoying, mumbo-jumbo way of it is just gnome to the bone. Likely a gnome long ago got some poor human to trade their cows for that "magic word" and off they flew.

ab·ra·ca·dab·ra

Pronunciation: \ˌa-brə-kə-ˈda-brə\

Function: noun

Etymology: Late Latin

Date: 1565

1 : a magical charm or incantation
2 : unintelligible language

GWD: Bugaboo

You know what gnomes are scared of? Bugaboos. That's right. Of course they are. And you see the unknown etymology of "bugaboo?" It's because it's from the gnomes, like so many of those words. The reference to bugbears is curious, as I'm sure bugbears would gladly eat gnomes if presented with them. A glimpse into the gnomish world, since one can know a people by what they fear as well as what they value -- gnomes clearly fear bugbears. Good to know.

bug·a·boo

Pronunciation: \ˈbə-gə-ˌbü\

Function: noun

Inflected Form(s): plural bug·a·boos

Etymology: earlier buggybow, bugger-bo, of unknown origin

Date: 1598

1 : an imaginary object of fear
2 : bugbear 2; also : something that causes fear or distress out of proportion to its importance

GWD: Hullabaloo

Gnomes. Although it's interesting to imagine Scots saying "balloo" to hush children.

hul·la·ba·loo
Pronunciation: \ˈhə-lə-bə-ˌlü\

Function: noun

Inflected Form(s): plural hul·la·ba·loos

Etymology: perhaps from hallo + Scots balloo, interjection used to hush children

Date: 1762

: din; also : uproar

GWD: Claptrap

Again, the gnomes aced the hyphen to try to "humanize" this word, but I know gnomespeak when I hear it and see it.

clap·trap

Pronunciation: \ˈklap-ˌtrap\

Function: noun

Etymology: ²clap; from its attempt to win applause

Date: 1799

: pretentious nonsense : trash

GWD: Gewgaw

This is one that likely had a hyphen, but gnomes axed it. Origin unknown? Gnomes, dammit. It's just so obvious (and the meaning of it is very gnomish, too).

gew·gaw

Pronunciation: \ˈg(y)ü-(ˌ)gȯ\

Variant(s): also gee·gaw \ˈjē-, ˈgē-\

Function: noun

Etymology: origin unknown

Date: circa 1529

: a showy trifle : bauble, trinket

GWD: Higgledy-Piggledy

You may have noticed that I sometimes do more than one Gnomish Word of the Day (GWD). That's right. It's deliberate. Because it's gnomish to be capricious that way. Some days there may be only one GWD. Some days there may be four. You can never really know. And that's exactly what makes gnomes so fucking creepy, them being all higgledy-piggledy!

hig·gle·dy–pig·gle·dy

Pronunciation: \ˌhi-gəl-dē-ˈpi-gəl-dē\

Function: adverb

Etymology: origin unknown

Date: 1598

: in a confused, disordered, or random manner

— higgledy–piggledy adjective

Origin unknown, yet hearkening to the 16th century? Gnomes. You can almost see their curly-toed shoe tracks on this one.

GWD: Topsy-Turvy

You know I'm not done with gnomish hyphenated nonsense compounds yet, yes? It seems that there was a lot of gnomish influence on human language in the 16th century...

top·sy–tur·vy
Pronunciation: \ˌtäp-sē-ˈtər-vē\

Function: adverb

Etymology: probably ultimately from tops (plural of ¹top) + obsolete English terve to turn upside down

Date: 1528

1 : in utter confusion or disorder
2 : with the top or head downward : upside down

Plenty more where that came from.

And, once again, you can see that gnomes are fond of causing confusion and delay.