GWD: Flim-Flam

Note the uncertain-yet-Scandinavian origins of this word, and the meaning of it. "Deceptive nonsense?" -- from Old Norse "flim" meaning "mockery?" Gnomes. Gnomes, I tellya!

flim-flam
Pronunciation: \ˈflim-ˌflam\

Function: noun

Etymology: perhaps of Scandinavian origin; akin to Old Norse flim mockery

Date: circa 1570

1 : deceptive nonsense
2 : deception, fraud

GWD: Razzmatazz

No doubt gnomes sought to get with the times with razzmatazz, showing that even they could be hip, swingin', and with it, while maintaining their whimsical lameness...

razz·ma·tazz
Pronunciation: \ˌraz-mə-ˈtaz\

Function: noun

Etymology: probably alteration of razzle-dazzle

Date: 1942

1 : razzle-dazzle 3
2 : double-talk 2
3 : vim, zing

GWD: Pell-Mell

Moving through gnomish hyphenated nonsense compounds, the venerable pell-mell makes a showing. Note the continuing gnomish memes of confusion and disorder...

pell–mell
Pronunciation: \ˌpel-ˈmel\

Function: adverb

Etymology: Middle French pelemele

Date: 1590

1 : in mingled confusion or disorder
2 : in confused haste

— pell–mell adjective or noun

Often makes me think of Pell Grants. You definitely don't want to fill out your Pell Grant applications pell-mell, gentle reader.

19: Hurdy-Gurdy

The hurdy-gurdy manages a doubleshot of gnomishness -- ridiculous in name and in conception, gleefully eccentric, pointlessly innovative and affectedly whimsical. It is, without a doubt, a gnomish musical instrument foisted on innocent humanity, long ago, and now the province of loons and hipsters.

The coolest thing about the hurdy-gurdy is Donovan's psychedelic tune, "Hurdy Gurdy Man," but beyond that, this contraption has little proper place with humanity, and has everything to do with gnomes, and their invidious agenda.

For example, look at this poor waif of a girl (left) when she first receives her hurdy-gurdy. Just a whey-faced lass with grand drems of making it in a difficult and dangerous world, grateful for this gnomish gift given to her by the twinkly-eyed tinker who came to town. "Why, sure, Donatella! You can make a fortune with this yonder hurdy-gurdy! You can grind away happy little tunes that villagers will dance to, tossing stray coppers at your feet like they were junebugs flitting from fields of barley on a summer's day!"

I'll add the word to the list of gnomish vocabulary words, for surely the hurdy-gurdy eminently qualifies for inclusion, both as a word and as a musical instrument...

hur·dy–gur·dy

Pronunciation: \ˌhər-dē-ˈgər-dē, ˈhər-dē-ˌ\

Function: noun

Inflected Form(s): plural hur·dy–gurdies

Etymology: probably imitative

Date: 1749

1 : a stringed instrument in which sound is produced by the friction of a rosined wheel turned by a crank against the strings and the pitches are varied by keys
2 : any of various mechanical musical instruments (as the barrel organ)

Look what happens to that same girl, just a few years later, as she's ground her life away on the rosin-dusted wheel of the pernicious, gnomish hurdy-gurdy (below). Hopes and dreams turned to dust and ash, blind, bald, bearded, slack-jawed, hopeless, yet still spinning her hurdy-gurdy wheel, vainly, desperately hoping that gnomish gift will bring her that promised paydirt.

A lesson to us all: Beware of gnomes bearing gifts, for they will only bring doom to feckless, hapless humanity.

GWD: Willy-Nilly

By now, you will have noticed a tendency for gnomespeak to involve hyphens and repetition of nonsense words (e.g., razzle-dazzle, fuddy-duddy, heebie-jeebies, etc.) -- here is yet another addition to the gnomish lexicon, one that actually has a longer provenance than many of the others, curiously enough...

wil·ly–nil·ly

Pronunciation: \ˌwi-lē-ˈni-lē\

Function: adverb or adjective

Etymology: alteration of will I nill I or will ye nill ye or will he nill he

Date: 1608

1 : by compulsion : without choice
2 : in a haphazard or spontaneous manner

But notice the gnomish values of impulsiveness and whimsy are retained in it. And in gnomish aesthetics, why use one word, when you can use two nonsense words bound by a hyphen to communicate your pointless point?

18: Rube Goldberg Machines

I haven't delved into the gnomish addiction to contraptions too much, trying to lay the foundations of gnomedom before proceeding to its deeper mysteries, but the time is right to bring up the Rube Goldberg Machine as a terribly gnomish notion, succinctly defined as:

A Rube Goldberg machine is a deliberately over-engineered machine that performs a very simple task in a very complex fashion, usually including a chain reaction... the expression has expanded to denote any form of overly confusing or complicated system.

Over-engineered, overly confusing or complicated? Gnomish, in other words. I imagine a proper gnomish household to be full of such contraptions.